On the arrival of Ryder & Brynley

On Sunday, August 11th, at 6:46pm, Ryder Thomas was born, weighing 4lb3oz, and measuring 17.5 inches long.

Two minutes later, at 6:48pm, Brynley Marjorie was born, weighing 4lb14oz, and measuring 16.5 inches long.

 
For 2 days prior to delivering my babies, I had felt extremely uncomfortable. I was already in the hospital on bedrest (only allowed to get up for showers and potty breaks), trying to stave off infection due to P-PROM, and trying to keep my blood pressure in check. I was basically just being "fed and watered", as my OB put it. My lower back was really sore, and my belly felt extremely tight. I figured it was just the extra weight of the twins growing, and never thought much of it.

Here I am the night before I delivered...

I had posted the picture to Facebook and people had said I'd "dropped" and that they thought things could be happening soon... I was "in it to win it" as I would tell people, and was going to make it 1 more week to our 35 week goal.

The morning of their arrival, I felt "off", I had even texted DH early in the morning to "warn" him that he should get his papers for school done early because I was a little nervous. I had also noticed some mucus strings in my "leakage" the past couple of days and thought that was weird. My midwife visited and said everything looked good and they would probably schedule my c-section for 08/20, even though if they did, she wouldn't be able to attend and she was sad about that. She discussed how much further I'd made it than anyone thought possible, and that everything looked so great. I texted everyone the updates, and a little while later, DH came to visit.

During DH's visit, I was served my lunch and had a hard time eating it. I was so uncomfortable that I was rolling around in the bed trying to find a position of comfort. I just felt like everything felt so heavy. DH left to write his papers, and I tried to nap. I couldn't nap from the pain, and then continually tried to use the bathroom to relieve the pressure. No luck, texted DH again that he better be writing his papers because something wasn't right. This continued for about 2.5 hours. After every bathroom trip, I would tell myself "ok, time to call the nurse". I think I was in total denial about what was happening - I wanted to keep those babies in, damnit!

Around 4pm, after a particularly painful trip to the bathroom, with no relief, I finally called my nurse.

"I'm scared. I'm having really bad lower abdominal pain."
"How long has this been going on?"
"Two and a half hours."
"Two and a half hours?!?!?! Why didn't you call me?"

They hooked me up to the fetal monitor... the babies looked great. Me? Not so much. Contractions 2-3 minutes apart. I had went into spontaneous labor sometime that morning.

Oops.

Suddenly, my room was pandemonium. There were tons of nurses in my room, I was calling DH, my parents, everyone... This was really it. The nurses rushed me down to Labor & Delivery. I remember just asking for them to grab my cell phone, charger, and my digital camera. Everything else would stay in this room because this would be the room that I went to after the babies were born. Everything seemed to happen so fast.

I remember them getting me down to L&D, changing me (they didn't even want me to move on my own), and asking me where my husband was. The fact they were asking where he was scared me. I called him and he was 3 minutes away.

They called my midwife and she was on the way. DH then arrived. They then told me that my OB had someone covering for him because it was his son's birthday. Awesome. The thought of having some doctor I didn't know operate on me and deliver my babies was beyond frightening. Then they told me who the doctor was, Dr. Morgan. Hey wait, why do I know that name? Because lots of my friends use him and he's delivered a ton of my friends' babies. I instantly felt better. DH changed into his scrubs, which was funny because he wears scrubs for his one job.

At some point, my mom arrived in the labor room, as did my mother in law. I remember someone telling me my dad and his girlfriend were in the waiting room, as well.

I remember them doing blood draws, and as was the case throughout my stay in the hospital, they couldn't get an IV on me. They made 5, FIVE, attempts in my left arm. Around this time, my RN husband got in a "little tiff" with the Charge RN, and insisted he try to get a line for me. He made an attempt in the left arm, but there was literally nothing left there. He then made an attempt in the right and got it! Whew! Finally an IV.

I heard the nurses keep calling the doctor to give him updates. "Her pressure is 220/110", "her contractions are getting closer together", "things are happening quickly". At some point, my midwife arrived and did an internal exam. Good lord, that thing was awful. Then, at some point, the doctor arrived. He was super nice, caring, and explained everything to us.

Oh, and according to my mom and my mother in law, "he is really good looking", lol.

Through all this, I was having contractions. Now, I don't know much about contractions. I had been having Braxton Hicks throughout my hospital stay up to that point. I had only ever felt 1, and that was like my first night in the hospital. That morning, I knew something was wrong, but I really didn't think that could be what contractions felt like. They felt like bad cramps and a sour stomach or something. Even when all this crap was going on, they didn't feel THAT awful to me. I think my bigger issue was that they were doing 5 million things to me at once and I'm trying to breathe through contractions and "oh hey, by the way, sign this form to allow us to give you blood transfusions if necessary", and "oh yeah, we need to shave you".

They started me on the magnesium sulfate, hereafter referred to as "the mag", and then Labetalol, to help my blood pressure. Dr. Morgan said they couldn't take me into the OR with my pressure so high, and that our goal was something under 160/100. They tried to wait it out, but my pressure wasn't dropping that much. They finally decided to just take me to surgery. I remember saying goodbye to my mom and mother in law, and them wheeling us away. At some point, I couldn't see DH and it freaked me out. Here, they had taken him into the recovery room until they started my spinal block. All of the sudden, I had a huge urge to just cry, although I never did.

I got into the OR, and my midwife was there. I felt so much better knowing she was there, it was a friendly, familiar face during a crazy time. They had me move to the table, put on my compression boots, and they were going to start my spinal block. My midwife was who I leaned against during the spinal block. Again, people make it seem like you are going to die from the pain of these things... I really didn't think it was bad... a little bee sting and then instant total numbing from my chest down. From that point on, they had to completely move me. They restrained my arms, put up the drape, and inserted a foley catheter.

Then I remember hearing Dr. Morgan come in, and they did the "test" to see if I felt anything... nope not a damn thing, lol. A few minutes later, they let DH in. He sat near my head and held my hand. I was never so happy to see him. He was BSing with alot of the staff in the operating room, which was funny to me. I was listening intently to everything the doctor said, and paid attention to what was going on.

After about 10 minutes, I felt a little bit of pressure and they said they were getting Baby A out. They got Ryder out, said "it's a boy!", and I didn't hear him cry - instead, it sounded like he was gurgling or something. This freaked me out. They then took him immediately into the other room (which they had warned us they would do since there was 2 of them) so the NICU team could work him up. I was hysterical crying.

Then suddenly, there was a ton of pressure on my belly. It literally felt like they were rocking me, and I heard them say they were "having a hard time getting Baby B out". Then suddenly, no more pressure, and I heard the doctor say "the cord is around her neck twice", and then lots of screams from Brynley. She didn't stop screaming most of the time she was in the room, lol. They brought her over to the area they were working on her at, which was to the left of me, so I could see everything. I felt more confident in how she was doing, regardless of her having had the cord around her neck, because she was screaming so loudly, lol. Drama queen already.

At some point, they brought both babies over to us, one at a time, and we got the above pictures. I wouldn't see them again until the next night.

After that, I was extremely nauseous, but never vomited. It took maybe 30-40 minutes for them to put me all back together, and then they transferred me to the recovery room. I just remember really wanting ice chips and apple juice, lol.

In recovery, I just kept hounding people to find out how the babies were. I just remember thinking that if something happened, I wasn't even completely sure what my babies looked like or what they weighed or anything. One of the techs went and got all their info and wrote it down on an index card for me - I still have that card. Ryan was taken to the NICU to see them, and at some point, I guess our families saw them too because my mom still talks about how Ryder grabbed her finger at 1 hour old, lol.

Ryder was put on a room-air C-PAP, and Brynley was put on a nasal cannula... no other issues (thank you steroid shots!)

During this time starts what I refer to as "the hell of the mag". Magnesium sulfate is an awful medication, and everyone who's ever had it says that you feel like you got hit by a Mack truck - this is no exaggeration. I literally was sweating buckets, was super thirsty, was itching beyond belief, and almost hallucinating. I couldn't focus my eyes on anything and my mind was super cloudy. After 2 hours or so in recovery, I went back to a labor room. They had to keep me on the L&D floor because I was too high risk and needed too much care.

Eventually, DH had to go home really quickly to submit those damn papers he was working on for school, so my mom stayed with me. I was so hot I had the room set to like 50 degrees, was packed with ice, and had cold washcloths all over me, and was STILL sweating. I froze my poor mom out. DH came back after a little bit and I asked him to bring me a milkshake, lol.

The next morning (I barely slept), I asked to start pumping for my babies. I pumped religiously for 20 minutes, every 2-3 hours. I couldn't see my babies, I couldn't touch them, but I was going to do something for them. DH would go to the NICU and take pictures of them for me, even though I really couldn't focus on what they looked like, thanks to the mag.

I remember us having lots of visitors, but don't really remember who exactly was there or what happened. After 24 hours on the mag (normal dosage), I remember begging my midwife to take me off of it. Within an hour of her stopping the medication, I felt better but my mind was still a bit foggy - I do remember that my night shift nurse wheeled me to the NICU in my bed with DH by my side. It was the first time I really got to see the babies since delivery. I cried hysterically, even though they were totally ok. By that time, Ryder was off the C-PAP and on a nasal cannula like his sister. It felt nice just to see them, but all the wires freaked me out.

That is the story of their arrival, I'll focus more on their NICU time and the c-section recovery in other posts. :)

On 33w4d & Water Breaking

Just when it seemed like everything was going so well, life hands you a curve ball.

On Wednesday, 07/31, I was discharged from the hospital to almost total bedrest. My OB & midwife figured that mentally, it would be easier for me to continue the pregnancy at home. But, the instructions were strict - 2 visits a week to the perinatologist for monitoring, 2 OB visits a week, only getting out of bed or off the couch for potty or snack breaks. No driving, no lifting, nothing. I could live with that. I signed out at 5pm.

Around 7pm, I had run out of water and since Mojo had been attached to my belly and not eaten his dinner, I figured we could both go downstairs for a few minutes & I would force him to eat & go outside. When I stood up from bed, I felt something but wasn't sure what. When I went downstairs, I had an immediate gush of fluid - just like in the movies. At first I thought maybe the weight of the babies caused me to urine myself, then I got scared and though maybe I was bleeding... I went to the bathroom to check and it definitely wasn't urine or blood - lots and lots of clear fluid that smelled a little bleach - one of my waters broke.

The amount of fluid that came out was insane. Every step I took, it gushed. If I stood still, it just ran down my legs. No one really prepares you for that - especially when you think you will end up being a scheduled c-section & not deal with all of this. Especially when you have 2 waters that could break.

So, I called Ryan and told him to leave work and head towards the hospital. Called my dad to come get me. And I called my neighbor/friend to come over. It was pandemonium in my house. Everyone was running around gathering things, calling the doctor, yelling at me to put on pants, and poor Mojo just kept crying. Lol.

We finally left for the hospital. When we or there, the staff didn't seem super concerned, which was odd to me. I figured they would be sending us to the OR ASAP to get the twins out. After speaking to the attending physician, he said because I'm not in active labor, I'm not in distress, the twins aren't in distress, there's no reason to immediately deliver. The plan is to load me up with antibiotics to prevent infection from the broken sac, monitor me & the twins, and let us go to as close to 34 weeks as possible. If I went into labor, they wouldn't prevent it, but they aren't going to just take them.

This condition is called P-PROM. I learned more about it from the perinatologist the next day when she did an ultrasound to check their fluid levels. They both still have great fluid, and I'm able to eat & drink enough to keep them producing it, so no worries so far. I'm actually still leaking fluid all the time, but not like the initial gushes.

The first 2 days I was on 24/7 fetal monitoring and unable to get out of bed at all or even really sit up. After that, they moved me to a less acute care floor, where I can get up to shower and go to the bathroom and we are only doing fetal monitoring twice a day.

So far, everything has looked great. The babies are still growing and creating their own fluid. My blood pressures have been good, and the only really concern is some lingering liver function issues (probably from the pre-eclampsia), and I had been steadily losing lots of weight. But, as of this morning, I had a small weight gain - I'll take whatever I can get.

I started a 2nd set of steroid shots for their lungs. The mini goal is for me to make it 34 weeks (this Saturday), and the big goal is for me to make it 35 weeks (next Saturday). My OB would deliver me at some point after 35 weeks, assuming I don't go into labor on my own. He does his rounds here on Tuesdays, so if I had to guess 08/20 may be the day!

On 32w3d & hospital bedrest

Well, what an insane couple of days.

Starting around last Sunday, I started feeling "off". Just not myself, nauseous, decreased urine output, and this insanely itchy rash all over my body. I thought maybe it was PUPPs, so I just figured I could hold out until my OB appt on Wednesday. I was taking cold oatmeal baths and using my Sarna lotion but the itching made me want to rip my skin off. I couldn't sleep at all.

At the OB appt on Wednesday, my OB drew lab work to test me for Cholestasis of Pregnancy. I had a girlfriend who had it during her first pregnancy and I knew it was hell for her. I read 1 website on it and then had to stop myself because it sounded so desperate and scary.

I spoke to my OB Thursday and seemed to be getting worse. He wanted me to come in Friday. Friday morning, I started gathering things because I was pretty sure he was going to have me admitted to the hospital again. Sure enough, he wasn't loving what he was seeing. My blood pressure was still creeping up and my urine dip had me at +4 protein (really bad). He said they would be admitting me... I said "but not like to deliver the babies, right?" And he said "we ha w to see what we are dealing with."

I lost it completely.

Thankfully, he was able to talk sense into me, and after gathering some things at home, DH & I went to the hospital.

They started me on steroid shots to help develop the babies' lungs and started monitoring me and the babies immediately. I also started a 24 hour urine collection to monitor my protein. They thought they found some sort of infection, so I was also started on antibiotics.

We then were taken to Maternal Fetal Medicine for a consult with the perinatologists. Thankfully, the ultrasound showed that both babies were doing amazing - 4lb8oz each, their fluid levels were good, and their membranes were still in tact. The perinatologist was not nearly as concerned as my OB about my blood pressure and was actually able to talk my OB down from having me start an awful medication for my pressure (magnesium sulfate).

We would not be delivering the babies that day. I was beyond thankful.

My midwife visited me and said I looked alot better than I did on paper. I was monitored all night, which is difficult and makes it so I can't sleep. As soon as I move an inch, one of the twins move and the nurses rush in to relocate them on the monitors.

I spent all of Saturday on my back so they could trace the babies, which was extremely uncomfortable for me and was raising my blood pressure. I wasn't having much urine output either (which they were monitoring) because of being flat. The results of my 24 hour protein came back and I was at 2460 - pre-eclampsia diagnosis is at 300. It was devastating to me.

We had a consult with a neonatologist on Saturday. She herself is the female half of a boy/girl twin set and she has a set of boy/girl twins - so I felt like she totally understood where I was coming from. She said due to their great size and me being over 32 weeks, she thinks we won't have to worry about the normal major preemie issues. They would still be an automatic NICU admission if born under 36 weeks, but she made me feel more confident about things.

Yesterday, my midwife came back and we were discussing everything. I said "so how long do you think I'll be here?" (Thinking I would be discharged on Monday aka today.) She said "1-2 weeks... Until you deliver."

I have never cried so hard. I knew it was a probability (my OB told me after my last admission that if it happened again, I would be admitted until I delivered), and I know it's the best for me and the babies, but it was still unbelievable to hear her say it. I wasn't going home until I had my babies. I couldn't sleep next to my husband or our dog. I was confined to this hospital.

And besides that, it meant I would definitely be delivering these babies alot earlier than I had ever anticipated... And even though the neonatologist made me feel more confident about it, it is still upsetting. I will have premature babies.

Since then, things have really kind of turned around. I was moved to a less acute care floor and no longer have the 24 hour monitoring of the babies, so I finally slept last night. My blood pressures have been awesome and my urine output has seriously increased. All of my lab work has been great and I don't seem to be fighting infection anymore.

At this point, I'm just catching up on really crappy TV and enjoying keeping my babies baking.

On my 3D/4D ultrasound, my baby shower, & my 1st hospitalization

I have been so overcome with circumstances and a crazy life that I've been neglecting my poor blog. When I had originally started this, it was mostly to track all my infertility stuff and to just remember every step of that journey. Now I like using my blog to remember everything with my pregnancy.

On 07/01, I had a regular appointment with my OB. I should preface this by saying that I had spent that weekend in high celebratory fashion.

Two days before, on Saturday, we had an appointment for a 3D/4D ultrasound of the babies. We had made a little event out of it, inviting some close friends and family. Both of my parents had been acting a little weird all week and making weird comments, so I knew something was up. Well, lo and behold, my sisters had all flown in. Not only was that day the day we would see the babies' faces, but it was also my baby shower. :)

At first during the ultrasound, neither baby would cooperate. They were both laying on their bellies and refusing to turn. I drank a Sprite really quick (sugar always gets them going), and soon enough, they started to cooperate.

In the 2nd set, you can see Ryder opening his eyes and Brynley smiling. :)

I had always said that I thought they would have my family's cheeks and DH's family's nose - and it looks about right. I think it's funny they have similar features, although Brynley definitely looks more feminine to me. <3 Brynley is such a bully, kicking her brother in the head the entire time, lol.

So, after the ultrasound, I went home to relax for a bit, get changed and head to the baby shower. It was really an awesome time. My friends and family did a Dr. Suess-themed shower, and it was just perfect. I was so overwhelmed with how generous everyone was, my children literally will not need any clothes through 9m size and we got all of the "essentials" for when they first come home. There is very little we will need to purchase!

Sunday was spent unloading all of the stuff in our house and attempting to organize some of it. That night, we had a big group dinner at a (sodium-rich) Mexican place that I love for my birthday. Afterwards, we went bowling. Yes, you read that right - my big pregnant ass bowled. This will all come into play later, lol.

The next day, I had my OB appointment. I had been stressed all day at work because I knew it would be my last day before my maternity leave. I had also noticed that I was super swollen. I really didn't think much of it, I mean, yes, of course my diet had been crap that entire weekend and I had went bowling, but whatever. Well, when I went to the OB, the scale showed an 8lb gain from 2 weeks before. Now, I weigh myself literally every day to watch for fluid retention. I hadn't weighed myself that morning because I knew it wasn't going to be good. But 8lb seemed excessive. I had done 24 hour urine collection 2 weeks before and my protein was at 178, which is low.

Then, my blood pressure was high - like 165/90. I have documented white coat syndrome, so I didn't think much of it. Normally, they'll have me do my appointment and then afterwards re-check my pressure, and I'm fine. So, we went with that. The appointment wasn't crazy, the doctor did pull me from work, and afterwards, I sent DH home since I was just going to have my pressure checked and I assumed I'd go back to work to get my things.

Notsomuch.

After about an hour of my blood pressure not getting below around 148/80, the doctor said he wanted me sent to the hospital for 24 hour observation. I was shocked. I had to call DH, ask him to pack me some things, call my parents, tell them what's going on, and then go to the hospital. I was a hysterical mess before leaving the OB and then again once I got to Labor & Delivery.

The hospital stay, in and of itself, was unremarkable. I had to do 24-hour monitoring of me, my blood pressure, any contractions, the babies' movement and heart rates, and 24 hour urine collection. I couldn't sleep because I was hooked up to a million machines and everytime I moved, the babies moved, and they would have to readjust my belly monitors. Of course, throughout the stay, my blood pressure was amazing and low. I spent most of my time just thinking about the babies and watching trashy tv. My nurses were all great, but I just could not get comfortable, and that hospital bed was the worst thing I've ever laid in. After about 26 hours, my OB discharged me and I went home. The protein in my urine was around 280, which is still under pre-eclampsia levels.

I was sent home with strict instructions to really start taking it easy. My protein levels seem to flip flop, so there is definitely correlation between me taking it easy and my protein being better. I can also see a huge difference in my pedal edema when I'm relaxing in bed versus running around like a loon. Since the hospitalization though, I've had ungodly carpal tunnel syndrome. Apparently, it's super common in pregnancy and general consensus is that there's not much you can do. DH got me some wrist splints, which I've been wearing while I sleep, to help with the inflammation. I literally can't hand write things, can barely type, and go from pins & needles in my hands to complete numbness. Awesome.

I should also add that I failed my 1 hour glucose test (by 3 friggin points!) My OB said under normal circumstances, I would've passed, but I'm held to a higher standard by the perinatologists. I did my 3 hour test on 07/08. It really wasn't as horrible as everyone makes it out to be. I survived, and I'm assuming I passed because I haven't gotten any crazy phone calls from the OB's office.

On 07/03, we got to see the babies again for a growth scan. Brynley was weighing 2lb15oz and Ryder was weighing 3lb1oz. As always, Bryn was kicking her brother in the head and generally, not being cooperative. Both babies are measuring ahead and looking great. We go back on 07/30 for our next growth scan.

On 30w & being thankful

I'm 30 weeks pregnant today. This signifies many things for me - namely that if I were to deliver now, I wouldn't necessarily need to deliver at the higher tiered hospital with the bigger NICU (which is about an hour away), but rather deliver at my home, and chosen, hospital with the smaller NICU.

I've been neglecting my blog, but I had to write this post because I'm just so overcome with emotion right now (I blame the crazy hormones and the fact I've had such a hard time sleeping the past few nights).

As I was preparing for maternity leave, there were a few things I had to make sure I grabbed for home - getting rid of my huge snack drawer at work (lol), some of my personal effects, and namely, my wall calendar. I use my iPhone calendar (which also syncs with DH's) to record all of my appointments, but for some reason, I like seeing it on my wall calendar, as well. It gives me a better picture of the week to come.

Just now, I was sitting here and I looked at my wall calendar, and I saw the "30" written in today's block.

When we first found out I was pregnant, I would start numbering the blocks. At every doctor's appointment/ultrasound/blood draw, they want to know how far along you are, and at first, it was hard for me to remember. Seeing the numbers helped me.

But I remember having this profound fear of numbering the blocks too far in advance - almost like I would jinx myself, and it would cause me to lose one, or both, of the babies.

Whenever we hit a milestone, I would add a few more numbers to the blocks. I don't think it was until after our gender reveal party that I actually numbered the calendar all the way through.

It just blows my mind that I'm 30 weeks pregnant today... That we've made it this far... That things, for all intensive purposes, have gone so unbelievably well. I never thought this day would come, I never thought I'd even BE pregnant, let alone this far along. And I certainly never thought I would be having twins. I just can't stop crying thinking about it. Thinking about all the pain that infertility and the treatments has on your soul, the permanent scars it makes - that I still have days where I wake up and think my belly isn't going to be there anymore. Days where I just wait for something to be wrong because there's no way I'm deserving of all of this. The emotions are just very overwhelming today. 

On my Surprise Work Baby Shower!

Yesterday, I was extremely hormonal, cranky, hot, and just generally not in a good mood...

... and then they surprised me at work with a baby shower. LOL. I felt like such an ass for being so cranky and hormonal all day, and they totally caught me off guard.

It was so sweet of them and really unexpected. Alot of people showed up, we had yummy cake, and they gave me lots of really cute gifts for the babies. :)

Me & My Dad (we work in the same building)

Me & 2 of my work BFFs

Me & 2 other twin mommies at the lab (yes, mine will be the 3rd set of  twins at our lab)

On 27w3d & my 31st Birthday!

Yesterday was my 31st birthday. We celebrated by going to a Phillies game! We tailgated and then went to our seats in the Hall of Fame Club. I think I am permanently ruined for regular seats after doing Hall of Fame Club. It's a private, air conditioned section, with private concessions and bathrooms. It was awesome!

I've had an amazing past few years. I was 27 when I got Mojo, and when DH & I started dating. 28 when we got engaged. 29 when we got married. 30 when we moved into our home. And now, I'll be 31 when I deliver our babies. I was pretty sentimental and emotional this weekend, just thinking about how lucky I've been and how life is working out for me.

Here's Mojo loving on my belly. <3

I did my 24 hour urine collection Friday into Saturday, dropped it off at Labcorp Saturday, and also did my 1 hour glucose test. I'm really hoping that I pass the 1 hour test because I am so NOT feeling doing the 3 hour. I'm also really curious as to what my protein levels are in my urine. I'm about 90% sure this is my last full week at work. My next appointment is on Monday, and if my protein is over 300, that's it. I'm honestly ready to be done work, though. I get unreal swelling in my feet and ankles from sitting at my desk, and it's just getting uncomfortable.

I'm still feeling pretty good - tired by the end of the day, but overall, pretty good. I'm up about 35lbs as of this morning, and the babies are still wanting lots and lots of fruit. My sisters sent me an Edible Arrangements for my birthday, and it was like the best thing ever, lol. DH got me more massage gift certificates for a local pre-natal place. I went to Coach outlet and got a couple new purses. I got money from my mama, and I figure this may be one of my last opportunities to buy a new Coach bag, what with the babies coming, lol.

I had my first instance of feeling one of the babies have hiccups this past weekend - DH got to feel it. And I've noticed that the babies respond when they hear his voice... they just go nuts, which I think is so sweet. He talks to them in the mornings, lol.

We have our 3D/4D ultrasounf this weekend and I can't wait to see what they look like!

On 25w6d growth scan

I had a growth scan this morning for the babies. Both babies look great, big, and healthy!

Ryder was laying sideways across the lower part of my belly. He is weighing in at 2lbs.

Brynley is breech and trying to snuggle up under my ribs. She is weighing 2lbs 1ounce.

They are both around the 65th - 75th percentile for all of their measurements. But, the measurements are based upon singleton babies. So, the fact they are so big and measuring so well is even better since they are twins.

The perinatologist said I'm doing a great job growing them. I felt like a very proud mama :)

I also had a consult with the perinatologist about my blood pressure and possible pre-eclampsia. Overall, she is much less concerned than my OB. She said my protein was at 228 (with 300 being the marker for pre-eclampsia), and that even with my "high" just-get-into-the-doctor's-office blood pressures, I wouldn't be diagnosed with pre-eclampsia. She said that they would get concerned once I start hitting stroke ranges, or 160/100. She also said because the babies are growing so well, it's another sign that I'm not having pre-eclampsia issues yet. And, she said I could have mild pre-eclampsia for a long time in the pregnancy and still be treated as an outpatient, basically, just have a close eye kept on me.

She said that my OB is doing the right thing being cautious and concerned, but that he is doing everything right - just making sure I'm closely monitored. I go back in 3 weeks for another ultrasound to see how they are growing!

On 25w4d, pre-eclampsia, & getting the nursery ready

I'm 25w4d today. According to the scale this morning, I'm up 30lbs, but I'm not sure that's completely accurate because I am definitely swollen today. It's ungodly humid everywhere I go, and my poor fingers were so swollen this morning that I couldn't even wear my wedding set. :( I'm wearing my titanium "EMS" wedding ring instead, which is a little more forgiving when I'm swollen. I haven't been able to wear my watch or bracelet for a couple of weeks now, I guess the weight gain is going to my wrists? LOL. As I'm typing this, I'm thinking "I need to get a fan for my desk and I need compression socks".

At my past few OB appointments, the OB has made some comments about my blood pressure. I'm not getting crazy high readings, and have been tracking at home as well, and I'm always right around the 130/80 mark... sometimes higher when I'm at the doctor because I have definite white coat syndrome. I stress myself out about the blood pressure reading, knowing I'll be in trouble because it's high, and then what happens? It's high. If I can wait until the end of the appointment to have it taken, it's always much lower and within normal ranges.

Anyways, 2 appointments ago, my OB mentioned that I need to start thinking about when I will come out of work. At my last appointment last Wednesday, he told me he wants me out of work ASAP. In fact, he wanted to put me out of work that day. His concern is that my blood pressure is slowly creeping up, I'm having pedal edema from sitting at my desk all day, and because I'm already high risk, it puts me at higher risk for pre-eclampsia. He had me do another 24 urine collection 2 appointments ago, and my protein came in right under 300 - with 300 being pre-eclampsia (along with elevated blood pressure). He told me that he's "trying to be nice" with me right now because he doesn't want to stress me out more and send my blood pressure up, but that I need to slow down, treat this as the twin/high-risk pregnancy this is, and stop working. He said that if I keep at the pace I'm at, I will deliver the babies closer to 34 weeks or earlier, which really freaked me out.

I think the thing that freaks me out the most about it is that I feel great! Honestly, I love being pregnant, and there have been some minor discomforts at times, but overall, I just feel so good that it's hard for me to believe that something bad could be happening. If I felt like shit, I could understand things more, but I really just don't. He said that makes it even more concerning, because I'm mostly asymptomatic, and things could turn ugly quickly, and put the babies and I at risk. He said that I need to be at home, laying on my sides, eating/drinking/napping whenever I want in the AC and continuing to bake these babies.

Anyways, I'm trying to play Let's Make a Deal with my OB. I go back tomorrow for a blood pressure check. Thursday is my ultrasound with Maternal Fetal Medicine to see how big these babies are. My next "real" appointment with him is Monday the 17th. He asked me to bring DH since I'm "not being cooperative". I have lab appointments set up to do my 1 hour glucose and another 24 hour urine collection on the 22nd. He told me that if my protein is over 300, that's it - no more work. So, my hope is that if my blood pressure stays in check and I'm still feeling well, I can stay at work until July 1st... thinking that he will set up another appointment with me for after the 24 hour urine and glucose results come back for the last week in June.

Speaking of the size of these babies... I'm really excited to see them again on Thursday. My OB, when palpating my belly, asked when my next growth scan is... because he thinks they are big. Well, I'm SURE they are big - DH is big, my dad & sisters are all tall, and his entire family is tall. I've said from the beginning that I'm growing "Ryan-sized" babies in here - they have always measured ahead. Even as twins, they measure ahead for as if they are singletons.

Today the nursery is being painted. I'm beyond excited! All of the twins' bedding came in, and I did a color consult with an interior decorator to help pick paint colors for our entire house.

The nursery theme is My First ABC by Kidsline.

Originally, I wanted to do a safari/jungle theme, but everything was either very feminine or very masculine - and I wanted something that wouldn't look too "off" for either baby. My biggest "want" was something that had elephants in it because I love them! I figured this set worked out nicely. I plan on having the changing pad be a sagey green, Ryder's extra crib sheets being red, and Brynley's extra sheets being lilac. We are painting the nursery a sagey green above the chair rail, then a white chair rail, then a light tan color. Our furniture color is similar to that in the picture.

Everyone has been so insanely generous to our babies already, and I swear I already have enough clothes for them for the first 6 months or so. Once the nursery is set up, DH & I need to re-do their closet structure (the structure the builder puts in is crap and doesn't use the space well), and then I can really go through all the clothing and see what we really have.

Other than that, not much else going on... here are some belly pictures :)

Here I am at 24 weeks and 25 weeks.

On Things to Buy When You Get Your BFP

I'm writing this post specifically for one of my BFFs, Kasey, who I just know is going to get her BFP very soon.

When I got my BFP, I was honestly so clueless about pregnancy because I had spent SO much time just concentrating on the idea of getting pregnant and TTC. And, I found that many of the things I learned no one tells you about (probably because then no one would want to get pregnant, lol). I've honestly had a dream pregnancy so far, if you don't include the kidney stones - very little morning sickness, just normal aches and pains, and nothing out of the ordinary from what other mamas have experienced. However, I have been formulating this little list in my head for Kasey and figured it would be something good to update as I go along and learn more things about my pregnant body.

Medications & Personal Items

Zuplenz - it was a life saver for me when my morning sickness was at it's peak. It's the new Zofran, but dissolves faster, tastes better, comes in a higher dosage, and for my insurance, was cheaper than Zofran.

Colace & Fiber-Con - constipation hits hard in the first trimester, your digestive system changes due to the hormones. I'd never suffered from it before pregnancy and never want to have it again. My RE & OB both recommended these as safe and good to take on a daily basis.

Peppermint Lifesavers - the normal ginger ale, crackers route didn't work for me with my morning sickness (which, side note, lasts all day and night long). I would always try to keep my belly full and have the peppermint on hand. Also, in the mornings, I would drink juice versus water.

Sensitive Toothpaste & Mouthwash - I started having serious tooth sensitivity in my 2nd trimester and found out from my dentist that root exposure is common in pregnancy, resulting in sensitive teeth and/or bleeding gums. I learned to stay away from whitening toothpastes during pregnancy and to start a sensitive toothpaste... my issues have seriously decreased (almost gone completely!) since switching. Also, get mouthwash. I could barely brush my teeth without puking or gagging, so I relied on mouthwash some days.

Pantyliners - just trust me on this... especially if you are using Endometrin, lol.

Sarna Original Lotion (for injection sites) - my RE pregnancy nurse suggested this as I was getting awful bumps and rashes from my progesterone injection sites. It's the only thing that worked well.

Palmer's Cocoa Butter Massage Cream - my skin was like the Sahara literally from the minute I found out I was pregnant. I was literally flaking off skin, it was insane! I started using this as a regular lotion because of it's creaminess and the thickness. I've been using it on my chest and belly daily and don't have a stretch mark yet. I know the little bastards are coming, but I truly believe moisturizing daily has kept them at bay so far.

Missha BB Cream & Clinique Moisture Surge - I have always used the BB cream, but even with the moisturizing powers it has, I needed more in pregnancy, so I started using the Moisture Surge. Both are lightweight and feel so nice on your skin. I would use the Moisture Surge at bedtime and the BB cream in my morning routine.

Snoogle pillow - I don't use mine all the time yet, but on days where my back or legs are achy, I use it and love it.

Clothing

Non-underwire bras - I've been out of underwire bras since my first trimester. My belly sits really high right now, and I just can't tolerate the underwires.

Belly Band/Belly Belt - these didn't work so well for me (my belly was huge from the beginning), but I know others who had great luck with them

Gap Demi Panel Modern Boot Pants & Gap 1969 Demi Panel Sexy Boot Jeans - these were my "go-to" work pants & jeans in the first trimester. However, towards the end of my first trimester, I had to switch to full panel pants because it was just too uncomfortable. I also like that Gap almost always has promo codes available. I have consistently purchased my "pre-pregnancy" size from them and been fine.

Gap Full Panel Modern Boot Pants - these are my current "go-to" work pants. Totally comfortable, machine washable, and they look great.

Express Best Loved Bra Cami - I still wear these under almost all of my shirts. It really smoothes things out, especially when wearing full panel pants.

Motherhood Secret Belly Line - I love their shorts, jeans, and capris. Also, once you sign up for their email list, you get coupons and promo codes all the time and their online selection is much better than what's in our local store. They often do 30% or 50% off clearance, too. I have consistently purchased my "pre-pregnancy" size from them and been fine - mostly mediums, but I bought shorts in larges since I'm sure I'll be huge by the end of the summer, lol.

Books

I never read What to Expect When You're Expecting. In fact, I gave my copy (which had been passed to me by a friend) to another friend who was expecting a singleton. My pregnancy nurse at the RE had told me from the start that I needed the "multiples bible" aka When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads: Proven Guidelines for a Healthy Multiple Pregnancy by Dr. Luke.

If you are ever on a Mom of Multiples board, you find they all reference Dr. Luke. She has done great research into the best things for a pregnant mama of multiples, including weight gain guidelines. I read this book cover to cover in a matter of days when I got confirmation I was having twins. To be honest, I don't follow her diet guidelines exactly (I try to stick with the basic principles, but sometimes I just cannot eat that much food or eat those specific things), but I have been following her guidelines for weight gain. I'll be 24 weeks on Friday and I'm up 25lbs as of the scale this morning - which is right on track. She provides information that shows early weight gain is best to have big, healthy multiples at birth.

Other books I've read and found informative include:

Breastfeeding Made Simple: Seven Natural Laws for Nursing Mothers 
Mothering Multiples
The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers

As you can see, I plan on exclusively breastfeeding the twins and have been really trying to read up on information about it. I love that all of the books broke down "myths" I'd heard about breastfeeding and really took it back to it's core - a natural thing that almost every mother can do. I think the best thing about today's society is that women can do whatever they feel is best for their child and that there are options - but I also think that some of the issues women encounter with breastfeeding are due to lack of education (on their part and/or their healthcare providers' part) and can be due to a somewhat Westernized-thought pattern on breastfeeding issues.

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That's all I can think of for now, but will update with more as I think of it. :)

On Our Twin Gender Reveal Party

I wanted to do a post about our Twin Gender Reveal party. I had so much fun planning it, and we had such a great time with our loved ones.

To be honest, I originally didn't want to do a Gender Reveal Party. I knew that I didn't really want to do the cake thing, and it was hard for me to think of a way to reveal it without a cake... But, once I started thinking about it - all of our loved ones have been so unbelievably supportive and loving throughout our journey that I really wanted to share learning the sex of our babies with them. Plus, I love parties, and this will be my only pregnancy, so I wanted to really "do it all".

One of the first things I did was hire a photographer. During parties, I'm always running around so I never get to take pictures and I definitely wanted our reveal and reactions documented. Julia is a good friend of my sisters' and she has recently started a photography business, so she was perfect for it. (She will also be doing my baby shower. I'm really excited to make photo books from both events to keep for the babies.)

When I first started planning it, I knew that I wanted lots of pink, blue, and yellow. For the paper goods, I used the Party City Tiny Bundle theme. I bought coordinating stuff in pink and blue, and tablecloths in yellow from Party City, as well (I love that you can almost always get a good coupon or promo code with them).

I had seen a really cool banner made from ultrasound pictures on Pinterest, so I knew I wanted to do that as well. I bought the cardstock backing from Michael's, and had leftover blue ribbon from our DIY wedding invitations. I also wanted to make a "guessing sign" for our guests, which I made from posterboard from Michael's.

 

I also wanted to do something related to my cravings, so I used the leftover cardstock for that and bought cheap frames from Dollar Tree. I also bought cheap vases from Dollar Tree, and bought yellow roses the day of the event from our local produce place (super cheap!) to make centerpieces.

 

For the actual reveal, we used balloons - but not in the typical sense. I saw somewhere (maybe Pinterest?) that someone had done this... at our ultrasound, we didn't find out the genders. We had them put the information into an envelope. My BFF was at the ultrasound with us, so she got the envelope. I had purchased black balloons and tons of pink and blue confetti. Her job was to put the correct colored confetti in the balloons (blue for boys, pink for girls, blue & pink for boy/girl), blow them up, and put them in a box. When it was time, everyone got a balloon and a thumbtack, and we all popped them at the same time.

 

 

 

 

As you can see, I was very surprised by the color of the confetti.

And I can't forget the very handsome big brother, Mojo. :)

On 22w5d & Baby Names

We decided on the names for the babies a few days after our Gender Reveal party. I have loved Ryder throughout my pregnancy, and if it were 2 boys - it would've been Ryder and Reid. I was so thoroughly convinced it was 2 boys, I hadn't really thought of girl names. I always loved Bryn (Ava was my #1 girls name, but there are too many Ava's these days), but I wanted something different than just Bryn - so Brynley it is. I love both names because there won't be 30 of them in their classes at school. Thomas is for my dad, and Marjorie is for DH's grandmother who recently passed away.

We visited DH's dad in California around my 20th week of pregnancy. Honestly, flying that pregnant with twins wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I bought 2 bottles of water to keep hydrated, plus the drink service on the flight, and lots of snack options. I also brought along a couple of my breastfeeding books to keep me occupied, since I can't read on planes. We got Exit Row seats right near a bathroom, which was great because my bladder was definitely giving me a workout. I did have some back tightness after the flights, but my back has always been tight, so that's not a shock. I did also have some ankle swelling, but it went down only a few days after each flight. My biggest suggestion for flying with pregnant is to hydrate!!!

We had a great time in California, visiting with our best man, his wife, and their daughter (who is almost 2)... we had never met their daughter, so that was the best part. DH's dad was also always loving on my belly. When we were leaving to go home, he kissed my belly and talked to the babies. <3

Here's my 20 week belly in California. Also, here is DH & I in Cali.

I had an appointment with my OB last week. He is super happy with everything in the pregnancy, minus my hypertension when I come to his office. I swear that I just have white coat syndrome because my pressure is great at home. He told me to just continue logging my blood pressure at home because we need to keep an eye on it. I will be doing another 24 hour urine collection to check my protein in the urine, and in a few weeks, I will be doing another 1 hour glucose test. We also discussed birth control after the babies are born - I'm insistent that I'm done having babies after this pregnancy, but don't want to do anything permanent yet... so I'm thinking of the Paraguard IUD. The OB told me that in his professional opinion, I'm "not done having babies yet". LOL. I also discussed exclusively breastfeeding the twins with him, and he said that it'll be difficult, but that with what he knows of me, he knows I will do it.

As of this morning, I was up 24lbs, which puts me right on track with my twins book recommendation. I'm definitely feeling the weight gain more now. I'm seeing my chiropractor every 2 weeks or so to help with right hip pain, and I'm so hot at night that we had to turn our thermostat down to 66 (lol) and I'm sleeping in a sports bra and boy shorts - and still sleeping without covers most of the night. It's such an odd sensation, like only my belly feels hot. I'm still applying my cocoa butter every morning, and not a single stretch mark yet, which honestly shocks me. I know they are coming but I certainly thought they would be here already.

Our gender scan went really well, and it was amazing to see the babies in such detail. They have changed who is lower, and now Ryder (on my right) is technically Baby A. They were both super active, and were currently both breech position. I think Ryder may have flipped though, because he has been giving strong kicks in the top of my stomach. DH finally got to feel the babies kicking this past weekend. I felt so awful that he hadn't felt them yet.

Also, I got a surprise this weekend when 2 of my sisters flew in as a surprise, since they couldn't make the gender reveal party... it was great!

I plan on ordering our nursery bedding this week and we are working on estimates from painters to paint the nursery (and the rest of the house). It blows my mind that the babies could be here in 3 months!

Here's me at 21 weeks and 22 weeks (I'm finally starting to figure out how to take self pictures with an iPhone, lmao!)

Here is big brother Mojo loving on my belly.

And here are some baby feet. :)